In my last post I mentioned a video I was working on from Parkersburg West Virginia. Well that video is almost finished and hopefully I will be able to post a link to it on here so it can be viewed. I will put it up ASAP because I am really excited about how good it is looking and I can’t wait to share it with you. My hope is it will be the first of many ministry videos to help raise funds for different churches and their programs.
Also, as previously mentioned in my last post, I am not a blogger so I’m learning as I go and I apologize for the delay in putting up posts. I am not yet in the habit of writing a blog and the commitment it takes to journal out thoughts for people to read is more demanding than any relationship I’ve ever had with the internet before. But we will get there, and for now here is my most recent travel excursion…..
This past week I was traveling* to the Keystone state to visit family and also listen in and interview for a job offer. To be honest I didn’t quite know the official position of the job I was applying for, but knew that it involved some level of management, responsibility, and making adult choices that would affect other peoples livelihood on a regular basis. No stress right? It turns out the actual position was basically that of a general manager for a small bed and breakfast type business in an historic part of town. It was a very charming and cozy little place with historic ties to the Civil War. With the history and origin of the house dating back to circa 1750’s this place had a lot of charisma and was wonderfully pleasant to take a tour through.
Prior to coming up for the interview I had a number in my head that I felt would be significant enough for me to take the job, allow me to save money while paying off some debts, and still allow for finding opportunities to shoot video for churches in the area. In my head, the conversation between me and God was “If this is the opportunity you want me to take, then this is the number that I will recognize as being yes”. That number only came up in conversation once though and it was followed by stares of bewilderment from across the table. Needless to say, that was not the number the employer had in mind, and it showed. The value I placed on my time and abilities as compared to my potential employer was vastly different.
After what I felt was the worst interview I’ve ever had the privilege of participating in, later that day over dinner with said employer I had been offered the job. I was surprised they even offered really because that’s how strongly I felt about my interview. But after a few comments and questions over dinner, a written proposal was handed to me by the employer. I’ve had a lot of jobs in my day, but never one where the boss hands you a letter all typed up and fancy looking with an offer for a job on it. This was big stuff for me, and frankly kind of exciting. I had decided before-hand that should such an opportunity arise, I would ask for 24 hours to make a decision no matter what. That was probably the only thing I felt sure about on the whole trip.
I spent the remainder of the night after dinner rereading the letter and listing out pro’s and con’s. I didn’t see the number I was looking for on the paper, but I wasn’t sure that meant God was telling me no. After much prayer and deliberation I wrote down my answer on a sheet of paper along with my list of pros and cons and I headed for bed hoping for an angel-like confirmation from God while I was sleeping. That encounter never happened and I spent most of the night tossing and turning instead. In the morning though I felt somewhat strongly enough that my decision was correct and this wasn’t the right job for me at the time. So I made the call to inform my interviewer of the decision, and packed my bags for my return trip home.
I didn’t have an overwhelming sense of joy, or peace, or confidence as I began my journey home though, I just sort of felt like I had made the right decision, and that God had other plans for me. And although I may not have a new and steady job currently, I believe there was a lot to take away from the trip and my experience.
One of my biggest questions during the trip was how can you discern an open door from God vs. just another opportunity? I’d like to think every opportunity is an open door from God, but I know that that’s not true, and sometimes we have to learn to say no. I’m not one for maintaining focus sometimes, I’ve already walked away and came back to writing this blog three times in the last hour, but I like to think I just made a career focused choice. I’m at the beginning stages of creating networks and opportunities in television, and I’m finding ways to use my time and talents for building the Kingdom. I believe this opportunity would have truly taken more time away from my vision to progress Good Works Media into a reality, and I think that was my biggest factor weighing in on the decision.
I’m not one for reflecting on what if scenarios, but I do take time to look back in life and see what choices I’ve made and where they have taken me. In a way I relish the thought of looking back on this moment some few years from now and smiling at the conclusion of this decision.
Only time will tell, but I have a feeling I’m headed in the right direction. Sometimes you just have to say no to get there.
That’s all for now, thanks for reading.
*Shout out to my mom. We had our first successful road trip together without incident, and she makes a great prayer warrior. I’m very grateful for her being a good sounding board for bouncing ideas off of.